Sunday, May 9, 2010

Happy Mother's Day Mom!!!

This morning....woke up a little late....just a little ok??? :P hehehhe.....I was hoping to go out for breakfast with my Mom on Mother's day but since I woke up late......so she went out alone to get some roti canai but in the end she came back with capati instead because the roti canai stall didn't open today. :( I stayed at home and cleaned the house. This also gives me a chance to do a surprise for her. I'm not really good with surprises.....lol....but I try to do it in the best way I know how for my Mom. I made her a Mother's day card.....didn't know what to write inside.....kept thinking and thinking all night and finally in the last minute this morning I finally get to jot down a few words from my heart to her. I can't say it to her face to face (it's so awkward)....so saying it in writing seems the best way to let her know how much I love her.

When she got home......she told me that the people at the wet market, those guys who sold fish, meat and vegetables wished her Happy Mother's day.....in other words....a  lot of people wished her this morning....and she's hinting at me that I didn't wish her.....hehehehe......so I told her, even though I didn't say it....didn't mean that I forgot......Mom....I wanted to surprise you but the surprise is waiting for you in your bedroom......hahahahaha.....then she laughed!!!! Mesti dalam hati dia berkata2...sabar je la anak aku nih.....susah sangat ke nak ucap Selamat Hari Ibu??? LOL! Yes Mom....it's hard....it's really hard when it comes to you....... :P

Honestly, surprising my Mom is never easy.......she rarely show her excitement even though it's a great surprise. You see....in our family, we have this verbal affection gap between us......it's something that we have since my sis and I were very small......my Mom is not the type who shows her affection like some mothers do......she's not the gentle, manja-manja type......she is fierce....aggressive....firm, military type of mother hehehehe......but dalam hati ada taman bunga! hahahaha! I think she puts up that wall to cover up that "taman bunga" inside her heart. LOL!  I have no idea why she does that......perhaps it's because she is used to being that way since small and does not want to change it or does not know how to change it....I could see that she is like that as well with her own mother......my late grandmother was not the type who showed affection with words either.......I guess they are the type who show their love in other ways....mostly in their actions....they don't say that they love you.....but they show it in their cooking or in ways of caring for you....things like that....get what I mean? Oh well....I'm  not good in explaining this either hahahaha........

People who meet her for the first time would be a little afraid of her because of her loud voice and tomboyish behaviour. People might misunderstand her. But I'm used to it already. I know her well...... :) It's not easy to live with her....because you sometimes get the impression that she hates you even though she doesn't........the way she talks.....most of the time in an angry tone.....like there is a bomb inside her waiting to explode hehehehe.....but I know how to tackle that  behaviour now..... :) I guess God knew the situation well......that's why he put me here instead of my sister. I know my sister won't be able to stand it......because you would need a mountain of patience in order to live with my Mom. hahahahha.....

My Mom and I are like night and day..........I'm a softy....and she's the direct opposite! She can't stand me being too soft....and I can't stand her being too hard. But honestly, I've changed a lot over the years.....as I know being too soft will get you nowhere.....you will get bullied as well. So I think now I'm quite balanced.....especially since I'm a Libra hahaha......so I'm balanced now.....hahahaha. I learn a lot from my Mom on how to be tough......she has toughen me up over the years......of course life experience helped to toughen me up too. :)

My Mom told be years ago that before she married my Dad, she was a softy just like me. But after she married him......he told her that she needed to change....he taught her a lot of things.....gave her a lot of his wisdom on life.....and she passed that wisdom to me and my sister. My Mom did not come from a wealthy background......she was very poor...but she managed to make a good living as a school teacher. If I were to compare her with me, what she went through as a child to get where she is today.......wow.....it's incomparable......I'm nowhere near her! I'm still left behind in a lot of areas. When she was my age now.....she already had a house...was married with 2 kids....stable job + income.....me??? I don't have all that....huhuhuhu......yup....I'm hopeless.....

I know my Mom is sad because I not better than her in many ways........and I know and realize why I'm not. It's just that I hope before any of us go and meet God one day, that I will be able to show her that I can make it on my own......be able to make her happy......in my own way. I can only be myself.....I can't be like her. But whoever I be.......I must always remember to be a good daughter to a mother who has given all she's got for me, the best way she knows how. I love you Mom for all the things you have done for me......you are not perfect, but you are the perfect mother for me.......God knows best!!! :)

I would like to take this opportunity to wish all mothers around the world a very Happy Mother's Day!!!! May God bless you with all the goodness in life.......for you deserve it! ;)

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4 comments:

mangosteenskin said...

Happy Mother's Day to your mom too!

Hmm, mungkin ada baiknya jg u n ur mom totally contrast...so masing2 boleh belajar from each other. Like me, Allah bagi ibu yg soft...coz I'm rough. Hehe.

I also feel awkward to say I LOVE U to people. Dari kecik tak diajar expressing love verbally... Berbeza dgn family hubby... They are very expressive. Utk seseorang yg tak biasa benda2 begitu, mula2 mmg kekok...tp when people say such thing to me...now i think mmg patut kita express such feelings. Kalau tak secara verbal, tulisan pun jadi. :)

Azlina Abdul said...

Thank you Mango! I'll be sure to pass the message to her! ;)

Yup...like I said in my post...perhaps God knows what is best for me that's why he made my Mom and I different in our behaviours. Memang ada banyak kebaikannya...dulu masa kecik2 tak nampak sangat kebaikan itu...tapi sekarang I can see how good it is in my life. I'm learning to express myself more now....even though in writings pun takpe...it's better than not saying it at all kan? At least we make sure that the people we love know that we love them so much. :)

Grace to You said...

This was another beautifully written post, Lin!

Azlina Abdul said...

Thank you Sandi...I'm glad you are enjoying the posts I've written so far :)