Thursday, December 31, 2009

Last day of 2009!

Ok....I'm starting to freak out here! It's the last day of 2009 and I'm just not ready to step in 2010 tomorrow. First time ever I feel so freaked out about stepping in the new year. Usually it doesn't effect me that much. Not sure why it does so much this time around. Probably it's because I feel like there's just so many things I fail to achieve this year. Need more time to achieve them somehow but it's not going to happen because today is the last day! haha! Time's up!!! So I have to move the unfinished business to next year and do my best this time around to make it all happen. With God on my side, hopefully it all will.

Hmmm.....let's see what were the things that made me happy this year. There were plenty of things that put a big smile on my face. Small things....big things......But what I love the most and remember the most right now would be the thing that happened during the month of Ramadhan. I think that was the most memorable one of all. The one that really really touched my heart. Why? Because whatever happened on that day and the days that followed, changed me a lot. It made me think about my future too. I can't really share here what it was, because it's kinda personal. I think somehow God answered my prayer on that day because I did asked God for it the day before and He gave it to me on the next day. It was something that I wanted so much in a long time but only to find out much much later that it was something I can't have right now or maybe ever. I was only able to borrow that happiness for a short period of time. And I figured it was just too good to be true for me anyways. No matter what, it was the happiest few weeks of my life, in a long long time. I wonder if I will be happy like that again next year.....I guess, I'll keep hoping that it will come my way again someday......

The second most memorable moment in 2009 would be when I got featured in the newspaper.....yup, TWICE!! hehe...It was something that I never expected in a million years to happen to me. It was surreal. Suddenly all the pain, all the frustrations just went down the drain. Came the rainbow and sunshine. It was beautiful......such a beautiful moment in my life. I shall treasure it always.

I also received a lot of gifts this year from friends and family. Gosh.....those gifts were so meaningful to me. I can't tell you how blessed I feel about them. And it makes me want to give back to others. There are a lot of things I want to do for 2010 and most of them involves helping people in anyway I can and also my own way of doing charity. I always thought that I'm too poor to give.....boy was I wrong!! Nobody is too poor to give out anything.....there is always something that we can do or give to others. I believe it so! Actually, we all should believe that. The world would be a better place if we all share and care about each other....right? :)

No doubt there were plenty of bad times.....but this time around I don't want to mention them here. It will only make me sad. I will just write them down elsewhere probably on a piece of paper and throw it away. Am letting it all go......far far away......

My new year resolutions are quite simple really.....nothing that's impossible to achieve. I got them listed down already and am determined to make it all happen. I want to concentrate on my health, career and family......and of course I also want to be a better Muslim.... :)))

So here I am......gonna say goodbye to 2009.....one of the most memorable year of my life. A year that has taught me so much about love and life. Year after year, there will always be something that I learn and gain from. Hopefully 2010 will be filled with loads of good things that will keep coming my way. Whatever challenges that I have to face next year, hopefully I can deal with them wisely. Peace of mind is also what I am after too. I am training myself to be calmer and less temperamental.....eheheheh.....whatever it is, I am aiming to be a better person....so help me God....I remember a friend once told me...."there is no perfect action, only perfect intention". :)))

Happy New Year 2010!!!!!! All the best of luck to all!!!
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